actually, i should have called this post, "i'm still a jerk... and then some."

updates:

have i called mr. onion?
no.

have i emailed mr. onion?
no.

have i done anything about mr. onion?
no. i've asked everyone and their mother, "what do you think i should do about mr. onion? it's been about a week."

i'm sure by now he's written me off, but my love advisor suggests that i need to work on my relational skills. not relationship skills, but relational skills. apparently, i'm not the poster child for social etiquette.

i have such a visceral reaction to guys who may be interested in me, when i'm not as interested in them. i get flustered and i don't know how to properly handle it. what's the nicest way to say, "i'm not interested?"

my M.O. (modus operandi) has been to do the quiet fade away. the "your answer is in my lack of an answer." that can't be the best way. i'm sure mr. onion thought for a minute, (i'm not too presumptuous to think that he was really hanging on the telephone for me) "what the hell? how can she tell she doesn't want to hang out with me again after one real date? bitch."

usually, i'd think: "hell, let him curse me to hell. at least he got the picture." now, i feel crappy.

i think i'll send him an email. (i know. ouch.)